Dear Macauley
We went to see Pizza Underground, and we have feelings.
As a part of FunFunFunFest Nites, Brooke and I went to see Pizza Underground after Ryan brought us up to speed on their famous member - Macauley Culkin. In a weird twist, pretty much five minutes after we made the decision to go (the night before they played), Macca2's death hoax exploded (death was hoaxed? hoax'd?). After some frantic phone Googling, and confirming they'd played in New Orleans that night and couldn't possibly have gotten to Manhattan (where he reportedly died in his apartment), we let out sighs of relief and the plan was back on. Pizza Underground. It was happening.
Okay. I think this is happening. We're about to see Macauley Culkin!
REQUISITE GRAINY PHOTOS AND VIDEO:
Wait. What just happened?
After having a pretty entertaining, definitely insightful time at the show, we sat down to hash out our feelings.
J: I think of Macauley Culkin a lot like this: http://youtu.be/P5_xTWdxMCM (warning, language at the end). So when the opportunity to see his Velvet Underground tribute/pizza-themed cover band presented itself, there was no doubt I'd be there.
B: Ditto. I mean, how could I miss the chance to see a guy who is in (arguably) one of the best Christmas movies of all time? Regardless of what went down, I figured it would be epic.
J: A big part of it was managing expectations, right? I expected...not a lot. And I think it exceeded my expectations. I mean, I haven't found a favorite new band, but I had a really fun time. And with Mac himself, I was thinking I'd see a sullen, grown-up child star. And that wasn't it. At all!
"Performing last night at the Belmont, Bernie style @funfunfunfest #imalive"
Macauley's first words: "I'm alive!" #pizzaunderground #FFFfest
— Jen Clapp (@jenclapp) November 9, 2014Brooke and I came up with the following little business plan/wish list to basically spread Mac's joy throughout the world. We're not saying he'd love all these five opportunities, but we ARE saying everyone else will. Promise.
5. Buddy up to Bill Murray, Wes Anderson, both. Be in some kickball games. Go on a house party tour. We feel like this is up your alley already. Bring that iPod, DJ.
4. Star in Beetlejuice 2. We're thinking about a role for you. So far, you and Winona are goths in love, but she's ready to adopt a mainstream lifestyle and calls on Beets to scare you straight. We get to see you look goth AND back in Richie Rich mode for a bit. Before she realizes, of course, that she loved you for who you were and not who she's made you.
3. Be a Marvel supervillain. Eat some carbs, get some sun, lift some weights. Be friends with Tom Hiddleston. We're pretty sure he'd squeal like a little girl if he found out y'all were co-starring in something. And we're ready to see those BTS pics. And to see you in the dance party that is Hiddles, Fassy and Co. on the red carpet.
2. Be our BFF.* We'll take care of you. We'll give you a safe place to voice your fears and frustrations. And your inevitable issues with your other BFF, Hiddles.**
1. Keep doing what you're doing! You be you; you're so good! You look happy and that's important. Follow your joy, Macca2!
*At our first BFF get-together, could you share your secret to the perfect pony? How do you get it so smooth without looking in a mirror? That was really incredible at the show when you just pulled it up so perfectly on the first try!
**I mean, I really, really think he'd love to hang out with you; he seems like such a cool guy. I think y'all'd enjoy the same Cool Guy things.
